I took an unexpected hiatus from my blog when I injured my back 2 weeks ago on Saturday. I wasn’t lifting correctly and my back proceeded to let me know it! I thought it would be okay, it’s not the first time I’ve done something I shouldn’t have, but when I woke up Sunday I was in agony. By Tuesday I was at the emergency room begging for any sort of pain killer they might be willing to give me. A CT scan revealed a bulging disc. Needless to say I spent most of that week flat on my back laying on my bed in my bedroom. Sitting was nigh on to impossible so even trying to work in my office was out of the question.
That gets boring after awhile...staring at the ceiling...watching the light from the window increase and fade as day turns into night and vice versa. Kind sisters would bring up meals for me and attend to my needs.
What does a Sister do when laid up? Ideally, you would think she would have more time to pray but in reality, if you don’t feel good or you are in pain it’s hard to concentrate and pray. My prayer was an ‘offering up’ of my pain for the suffering Body of Christ and an occasional Rosary or Divine Mercy chaplet. It would feel good to just hold the beads in my hand, even if I couldn’t concentrate on any words. I also have a little wooden cross that is meant to be held in your hand when you can’t pray with words. It’s edges are soft and it’s shaped to ‘fit’ your hand...sometimes just holding that was my prayer.
I spent a lot of time listening to NPR, EWTN radio and read a lot of books. I thought with all this available time I might as well start on some Classics I've always wanted to read. They had to be light paperbacks because I was flat on my back holding them above me. (not easy to do for a long period of time but it did get me through some rather sleepless nights)
So I started with The Hunchback of Notre Dame by Victor Hugo. (One of my sisters laughed at the irony of the title with my own back situation, it WAS rather amusing) I moved on to One Day in the LIfe of Ivan Denisovich by Alexander Solzhenitsyn and waded through Wuthering Heights by Emily Bronte. For some reason I had picked tragic tales...or perhaps a lot of the Classics ARE tragic tales...but I slipped in Catholicism by Fr. Robert Barron for more uplifting reading. I highly recommend his book or his DVD series and his website.
Every time I’m laid up with sickness or injury I tell myself I will never take my health for granted again. And that’s true immediately after my recovery but then it’s not long before I have forgotten. That’s typical...our life resumes its normal course. I’m in good shape, I expect to get my former life back!
But I’m hoping, at least for awhile, that I will take noticeable joy in being able to walk pain free, relishing each step instead of just rushing down the hall in order to get to my office, chapel or wherever I am supposed to be next. Living mindfully is difficult, it takes practice, and it is probably brought to our attention mostly when we get knocked off our feet for awhile. So, I can at least be grateful for that particular lesson from these past 2 weeks. I'm just sorry it usually takes a 'crisis' to remind me!
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